"If I was gay…" and "I’m not gay but…." by Zachary Colin Rance
no homo level 1,000
Maybe the whiskey’s gone to my head
But if I were gay
I would give you my heart
And if I were gay
You’d be my work of art
And if I were gay
We would swim in romance
But I’m not gay
So get your hand out of my pants
If I Were Gay by Stephen Lynch
me and my friends
my type of public transportation
“Why were you late in today?”
“Oh, I got tied up on the subway…”
I was always 50/50 on whether to reblog this but the last comment pushed it to like 95/5 in favor.
"What’s our stop?"
"You’ll get off when I tell you to."
Video: Nick Offerman Recites Some Profound Shower Thoughts [gifs via]
100lb of Magnetic Putty
science side of tumblr, please explain
When spoken word artist Brenna Twohy tells you that she is an unabashed devotee of all things “Potterotica” — erotic fiction based in the magical universe of Harry Potter — your response probably shouldn’t be that her taste is “unrealistic.”
I’m happy to be getting to the point where I don’t have to feel weird about enjoying fanfiction, or having written a bunch of it. Partly it’s that the fandom experience has become more broadly shared. Partly it’s that I stopped giving a shit.
And as for why I like the porny sort of fanfiction, see above. She says it better.
I like sex with context. I like sex when it involves fully fleshed out characters. I like the backstories. I like feeling like these people do other things when they aren’t having sex.
I suddenly feel like there should be a porn TV series. With an ongoing plot.
Post reblogged from with 249,230 notes
My thighs are huge cuz they’re full of secrets
Wrap them around my ears and let me hear them all
You smooth motherfucker
real time face tracking & projection mapping.
warmly recommended to all my followers! MUST WATCH
Photo reblogged from with 232,844 notes
Arnold don’t play no games hoe.
she looks so fucking pleased with herself
Imma frick them
DO NOT FRICK THE ALIENS
excuse me but your url is “fuck—spock”
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